Don’t shake your fist at God.

Written by admin on August 24, 2015 – 8:25 pm -

Don’t shake your fist at God. He likes to mess with you.

I made that mistake when I said “bring it on”, and unto me it hath been brought.


Posted in Uncategorized

Bring it!

Written by admin on July 25, 2015 – 4:48 pm -

Bring it!

Posted in Uncategorized

Dear God,

Written by admin on July 17, 2015 – 8:52 pm -

Dear God,

Is that the best you can do?


I am eviscerated, people are poking at my entrails and that’s it?

Bring more pain!

Stop slapping and fight light a deity.

3 rounds, 3 minutes. Me and you.

You get to make the rules, that’s right, this July there is a grudge match.

Me and you.

God vs. Puny Mortal.

A smackdown.

Let’s get reaaaaaddddyyy tooooo ruuuuuummmmbbbbbbllllleeeee!

I challenge you!

I’m drawing a line in the internet.


I dare you to cross that line right up there.


Posted in Burn, Jihad, Life and Death

That feeling.

Written by admin on July 16, 2015 – 3:57 pm -

You know that feeling you get when you think you have met the person of your dreams and then you find out that this person wasn’t that person after all and that in all actuality they were manipulating you from the first moment they saw you and just took and took and took and when they couldn’t take any more and you had nothing left to give they threw you out of the car like a crushed cigarette butt, bent, burnt and stinky.

I hate that feeling.

Posted in Uncategorized

All the things.

Written by admin on July 12, 2015 – 7:44 pm -

We begin at the end. Or the end of the beginning or beginning of the end. We begin now.

That was the shortest marriage I’ve ever had.

There is a song by the Waterboys called “All the Things”, holy crap this is the Internet, maybe I can find it on Youtube.

Oh yeah, here it is … down at the bottom of the post, the Internet is a miracle. Anyway, the song, you don’t have to listen it, I’ll summarize, a guy breaks up with a girl and he is driving around and is stopped by a nightwatchman who says, in an Irish brogue, “where you think you’re headin’ to son”

“Hey, I’m just looking for a place to burn all the things… all the things that she gave me…”

So I was at Public Storage and the cops were there evicting a schizophrenic, (which is another story, I suppose, along with my varied theories about Public Storage, how nobody goes there because they won the lottery)

There was a really attractive police woman, so I said, “Hey, I’m looking for a place to burn all the things she gave me.”

The gorgeous cop just pursed her lips and nodded, then she said, “Bull Run Regional Park. The county has really strict fire-codes, but you should be fine there.”

I think what was most shocking to me was the look of absolute gravitas that she had about her, as she was telling me where and how to burn all the things that “she gave me”.

She looked like she was taking this question very seriously and realized that I was trying to do a cathartic, cleansing, and harmless ritual to unchain myself. Maybe she had done the same thing once, or wanted to, or knew the feeling, but we had a moment there. That policewoman and I, we had a moment where we connected. Life is suffering, dukkha. We should have touched foreheads gingerly, as a sign of solidarity and the fact that we are all in this shit together. But if I did that she might have shot me with her .40 calibre pistol.

In summary, I didn’t want to pollute the planet for my kids anymore than it has been, so instead of lighting a fire and watching the toil of countless Chinese prison laborers go into heaven, I took them to GoodWilll, where the dudes were melting in the parking lot as they schlepped the heavy loads that make up the jetsam of people’s lives. All the things she gave me.



Posted in Burn, Life and Death, Random Stupidity

Shorting Vega and Algorithms Gone Wild.

Written by admin on July 8, 2015 – 10:28 pm -

I just had the pleasure of meeting the most interesting character, who is going to try and make money by shorting Vega.

In essence, he is betting on people returning to sanity.

For example, the Myth of the Grexit. Probably not going to happen, but media spins and spins until 1 std dev is passed in the stock price, then 2 std dev, but like a rubber band, it has to spring back to normalcy eventually.

However, I only glanced at the TVs walking through the lobby of the office and something is amiss with the markets, it look like … algorithms gone wild! W00t! “So yeah, we’ll totally panic due to a corrective sell-off of a bloated and inflated Chinese stock market and a tiny Balkan country saying, ‘hey maybe we can make a deal on this loan’, look at my tits!”

Posted in Uncategorized

Shorting Theta

Written by admin on March 22, 2015 – 4:15 pm -

My Uncle, who worked in the pit at the Merc always used to tell me:

“Nobody got rich shorting theta.”

I guess that is really trader shorthand for carpe diem.
I also think nobody ever got rich shorting civilization, by betting on society falling apart, unless you are in the business of building bunkers.

Posted in Uncategorized


Written by admin on February 19, 2015 – 4:21 pm -

Here it is, and will be updated:

Posted in Uncategorized

Did Jesus tap?

Written by admin on October 13, 2014 – 10:48 am -

Just saw a guy with a “Jesus didn’t tap” t-shirt.


according to the King James Version of the bible, while on the sticks this happened:

“And about the ninth hour Jesus cried with a loud voice, saying, Eli, Eli, lama sabachthani? that is to say, My God, my God, why hast thou forsaken me?”

According to CBJJ rules, if unable to tap, a verbal submission is sufficient.

He couldn’t tap with those nails in his hands.




Posted in Uncategorized


Written by admin on September 5, 2014 – 8:04 am -

Liberally borrowed from:


Yesterday I went to my office and there were no hoteling spaces so I had to sit in the lounge, which is kind of like the business class United airport lounge. There is a TV that plays CNN. Comfy chairs. Beverages.
The news, since I don’t watch TV or pay attention to it — was really terrifying!
It seems like black teenagers, with their hands raised (apparently the most dangerous kind) are joining ISIS (The “Islamic State of Iraq and al-Sham” and they are cutting people’s heads off. Meanwhile, Ebola is making people into zombies in Africa, if you are a young girl in Nigeria you may get kidnapped. Ebola – ISIS – Michael Brown, rinse, repeat if desired.
Then Joan Rivers died.
Stop the presses!
Forget about those people in Africa and the middle east, this is a celebrity who died during elective outpatient surgery.
Sanjay Gupta, whose name I just can’t stop saying out loud: “Sanjay Gupta”. It is like poetry. Like the name “Médecins Sans Frontières”.
It sounds so good. … well, he was skeptical as to the wisdom of having her surgery be outpatient.
So.. black teenagers joining ISIS are getting Ebola making them into zombies and they have killed Joan Rivers.
If this were clue, I would say Colonel Mustard in the Billiard Room with the Candlestick.
But this is Reality®, so my guess would have to be.
Mujahid / Black Teenager with Ebola around every corner with an Suicide Vest.
I should not watch the news. I realized this and listened to music.

Posted in Burn_Hollywood_Burn, Ebola, Hollywood, Jihad, Life and Death, Zombies